Why You Should Have an Emergency Contact Person For Your Relationships

October 8, 2021.Reading time 7 minutes.

Deputize someone to tell you the unvarnished truth if they think you are dating the wrong person.

On Reclaiming The Word “Slut”

April 13, 2021.Reading time 10 minutes.

I spent my teenage years terrified that I was a slut, and therefore I was not the type of girl who could be loved.

ASK ELLA: Should I Date Someone with Herpes?

June 25, 2020.Reading time 10 minutes.

Whatever you decide, I hope you treat your “someone” with the respect and thoughtfulness you’re showing now as you learn about their virus.

You Deserve a Partner Who Texts You Back

July 3, 2019.Reading time 8 minutes.

Maybe not immediately, maybe not every single time, but reliably and honestly and with care.

Why Should I Date Someone With Herpes?

January 28, 2016.Reading time 2 minutes.

Does your dick get hard around her? Is she nice?

Why Having A Boyfriend Doesn’t Cure Herpes

January 24, 2016.Reading time 15 minutes.

We’ve all read that essay: the woman who gets herpes because she caves to temptation just once and has a regrettable one-night-stand, but goes on to find happiness because she meets that one man who loves her just as she is, STI and all. You can find it in glossy women’s magazines and anonymous chat […]

Ella’s Guide To Texting Your Potential Bae

July 19, 2015.Reading time 15 minutes.

I’ve earned a reputation for being an assertive, direct person when it comes to letting someone know that I’m interested, romantically or sexually. What I haven’t talked about much is that many of those “hey, I want to bone you” conversations have happened over text message, when I couldn’t see the person’s face and they couldn’t see mine. […]

Bachelorella: The Nice Guy, Male Entitlement, and The Bachelorette

July 14, 2014.Reading time 9 minutes.

It was inevitable that I would some day write feminist commentary on The Bachelorette, and ladies and gents, that day has come. Tonight was the episode of the franchise when all the shit usually hits the fan: the fantasy suite episode. Last season, when our darling bachelorette Andi was merely a final three contestant on Juan Pablo’s […]